I Went to Church Today . . .

God Loves Me . . . I Will Choose to Love You

Country church in Iowa, USA

I went to church today.  Attending church is important to me.  I have not always wanted to go to church.  One day, I read a book by Phillip Yancey "Church Why Bother."  He explained in the book that church is the vehicle Christ left for us to gather, use our spiritual gifts and have a safe community to share His love.  

Today in church, I sat obediently in my chair - we don't have a pew in the 10:10 service.  I stood and sang and sat and sang.  Our family gave our tithe.  We prayed we listened.  We gathered with others and ate donuts and drank coffee.  I participated in my church duty.

This evening I took my Vespa for a ride in the country.  I had a chat with God.  I told him that I don't always like to be around people.  When I am around people I feel all these expectations.   I cannot live up to these expectations. I feel pushed and swayed by others opinions and needs.  I find myself lost and I forget who I am.  At times, I lose hope.  God reminded me that after Jesus spent a lot of time with people He would spend time alone.

When I am alone talking to God I feel love.  I feel strong.  I feel special.  I realize that God designed me with a purpose.  I believe I have unique gifts and talents.  

When I am around others - I start to feel inferior.  There is always someone prettier.  There is always someone more capable.  There is always someone who has more possessions.  Instead of celebrating my uniqueness and beauty.  I start to berate myself and fault find.  

I feel safe when I am with God - all alone.  No one watching. Just me and God.  God loving on me and me loving on God.  Why oh why is it so hard for people to love each other?

It occurs to me that loving is a choice not just a feeling.  I can love others whether they love me or not.  I can reach out in kindness and compassion and be the inspiration to spread love - oh how we need it today.

The greatest commandment is to Love God and Love Others.   Loving others begins with me and it begins with you.  Today find one person you can encourage with love.  Help them to feel special and to know they have a purpose.  Be the church to someone who needs to experience God's love and community.

www.stages2change.com

Desiring Change - When Money is Tight

Saying a Prayer of Gratitude and Trust

Bills keep coming to our house.  Monthly insurance, house payments, credit cards, groceries, car payments and on and on.  There seems to be more money going out than coming in.  

There is a provision that is more than money.

Reading the news, I see that many people are getting laid off, gas prices are skyrocketing, milk is $4.00 or more a gallon.  Medical insurance is almost price prohibitive . . . our family's insurance is many times more than our house payment. People are choosing to not have medical insurance because they cannot afford it. Let's face it - life costs!

What do you do when money is tight?

I have read all the cost cutting books.  I pay God first, use coupons, discounts, shop at Goodwill, market on Ebay, have garage sales and look for ways to save money and reduce our costs.  Still . . . it seems there is not enough money at the end of the month and sometimes in the middle of the month.

As a person of faith, when there is not enough money for the day, I believe I am being tested.  Will I trust God to provide for all my needs?  

If God is my provider, and I am the steward of my possessions, than I need to trust that He will give me what I need . . . maybe not what I want . . . .but what I need. 

When I consider today - just today . . . I am able to say . . .today I have a roof over my head.  I am in good health.  I have food in the cabinets.  I have a family who loves me.  I have a car to drive.  I am blessed.

My prayer of gratitude today:

Thank you God for providing for me today.  

I will trust that you will provide for me 

in the future, too.  I know you care for the birds in the air . . . 

I will believe that you will take care of me too.  

I love you.

Your child . . . Susan

www.stages2change.com

You Are Remembered

It is never easy when someone you know dies.

I remember 15 years ago when my brother and his wife were pregnant.  I remember their phone calls of excitement and anticipation. I also remember the phone call when they lost their pregnancy.

I remember the last year of my mother’s life. I watched her slip away into eternity.  A onetime tall woman full of life shriveled into a small delicate woman in a wheelchair.  I remember the last time I saw my mother.  She had come out of surgery and was in a medically induced coma.  My brother and I stood at her side holding her hands.  We spoke gently.  I saw a tear form in the corner of my mother’s eye.

How do we remember those we love who have left this life?  We may have regrets over what we did not say or do.  We may fell angry that our time together was cut short.  I believe each life has purpose – whether the life is long or short.  Each life can be remembered. 

I do not believe the American culture grieves well. Consider the one or two days of bereavement leave offered at many places of work. The expectation is to attend the memorial service have a good cry and get back to life as it was known before the death. Is that really enough time to grieve and go through the emotions of feeling shocked, sad, angry, depressed when there has been a death of a loved one?  I say emphatically NO! 

I believe life is so much more valuable.  When a person has experienced a death they will need time to grieve.  A grieving person needs time to experience the pain of the loss.  A grieving person needs time to experience God and the Spirit’s comfort A grieving person needs time to experience comfort in relationship. A grieving person needs to be able to freely talk about their pain and unfulfilled expectations. 

This is not easy to do being a “fix it” and “get over it” society.  Comfort does come in the form of knowing you are not alone in your grief.  Sometimes all we need is a person to be in the room.  Perhaps not even talking, just being present.  Another person can help ease the pain of isolation, which comes with grief. 

There is a universal truth; suffering is as much a part of life as good fortune.  We have a promise that when we suffer, we will not be alone.  God will be with us through the painful time.

Remembering our loved one will bring healing and comfort.  How can we remember our loved ones after they die? Here are some ways:

    • Memorial service. A memorial service is a time to reflect, honor and celebrate the person’s life. Memorial services may be public or private.  They can be with a few people or with a large gathering.

    • Write a letter. Letter writing can be very cathartic.  It is a way to reach out the loved one. Listen to the words of a letter a child wrote to her stillborn sister: “Everything that lives – plants, animals, and people – has a beginning and an end. Some are alive only a short time.  How long, or how short, doesn’t really matter. It is still that person’s lifetime.  And each lifetime is special.”

    • A teenager wrote this note to his mother after the loss of her child:  “I went to buy you a card today. It was a birthday card for the baby you did not get to bring home. We talked a lot about my sister, but that was a long time ago.  I worried that if I sent you this card, it would make you feel sad again.  But I think I know how you will feel.  I will be glad because I remember her too.”

    • Plant a tree or plant.  It is very honoring to plant a tree or a plant in honor of your loved one who has died.

    • Create a memory book or box.  Some people find great comfort in placing special things in a box or creating a memory book of their loved one.  This is a tangible place where the loved one’s presence may be felt and their life honored.

    • Draw a picture, compose a poem or write in a journal. These are some creative ways to remember your loved one.

www.stages2change.com

3 Steps to a Healthy Body

Last night I was reading in one of Dr. Gregg Jantz’s books on how to have hope and how to be healthy. I thought I would do an experiment and try his three easy steps – just for today.  The steps are very simple:  first do not weigh yourself, second eat a healthy breakfast and third move your body for 15 minutes.  

I don’t weigh myself anymore. The last time I stood on a scale, I felt it was staring back at me with a condemning finger and critical eye saying “YOUR FAT!”  Not weighing myself was an easy step to take.

I am not much of a donut, sugary cereal breakfast person so that was not too hard either.  I poured myself a bowl of granola with dried fruit and poured 1% milk on the granola.  Yummy breakfast.  I did drink a cup of VIA Starbuck’s coffee with cream – weak point for me.  After I dropped my son off at school, I decided to do step 3.  Move my body. Exercise for exercise sake has NEVER been easy for me.  Recently I have gotten lazy enjoying naps and sitting at my computer.


Today I chose to make the effort to move my body for fifteen minutes.  The morning was fresh and cool; I was reminded of a duck pond near our home.  Pulling in the parking lot I noticed someone feeding the ducks.  I found the path and walked around the lake.  As I strolled around the lake I noticed a group of geese landing in formation feet first on the lake.  I was amazed at how they were in a V shape and all landed with their feet touching the water in unison.  I thought of how God has created us to do amazing things and it is natural to use our gifts talents and abilities.  Like the geese we too can work together in unison, making a beautiful display of God’s handiwork for others to notice.  Just for today, I did take the 3 steps for a healthy body.  Just for tomorrow, I may do it again!

www.stages2change.com