The Key to Facing Fear

I am a creature of habit.  I am comfortable with my daily routine. I do not like change.  And I especially do not like change when it is imposed on me.  If I am to make a change - it helps when it is my idea.

When a project is my idea, I have an ownership of the project.  For example, if I decide to go to the gym to work out - I am more apt to go.  If I am told I need to go work out and do it three times a week - I probably will have a resistance rise up in me - that says "no way!"

Yes, I have a rebellious spirit.  I do not like being told.  I also can be fearful of change.  Change has a lot of unknowns, what ifs, and oh nos that come with it.  I fear change.

Courage is a response to fear.

I have learned that courage is a response to a fearful act.  You do not need to have courage, unless you are afraid.  If I decide to bungee jump off a bridge, I would be terrified.  Courage would be needed to get me to move off the point and take the leap.  MAking a change in recovery may feel like taking a leap off a bridge.  Will the bungee cord hold my weight?  What will be the outcome?  What if I fail? What if the cord breaks?  Risk is involved in taking the leap.  Taking a risk is the first step of change.  I found that making a change is easier when I have cheerleaders to cheer me on.  Change with a partner or a group is much easier than going it alone.  If you are facing the decision to make a change and are afraid . . .you may want to talk about it.  If your change involves you deciding to begin your recovery - send me an email and perhaps I can be your cheerleader.

www.stages2change.com

"Mom I Need Money for a Lawyer"

Thoughts on Teens Drinking and Driving 

The phone call came in the spring of 2006.  My son was a couple of months shy of 18. Living with his father in another state, he had gotten a job working with some business owners they knew from church.  One late night, my son and another employee hung out at work - drinking and talking. When it was time to head home, my son realized his coworker was too drunk to drive.  He decided to take him home using the company's truck.  Little did he realize, he too was too drunk to drive.  As would happen they got in an accident on the freeway.

My son was hauled down to the jail and charged with a DUI.  He thought he was being a "good Samaritan" in driving the coworker home.  He minimized the impact the alcohol had on himself.  Next he had to hire a lawyer, go to court, pay fines, attend a DUI school.  He lost his license and ended up having a probationary period.  All for a night of fun . . . drinking after work.

Drunk driving is the symptom.

Alcohol abuse is the problem.

According to Mother's Against Drunk Driving: "10,839 people will die in drunk-driving crashes - one every 50 minutes and teenagers between 15 - 20 years old have about 20% more fatal car wrecks than any other age group."

So how can your teenager stay safe behind the wheel?

Here are some things you as a parent can do:

* Have your teen take driver's education.

* Practice driving with your teen.

* Teach your teen safe driving principles.

* Guide your teen in how to manage road hazards.

* Educate your teen on the effects of drugs and alcohol.

Enforce driving rules:  

  * No driving after a certain hour.

  * Do not drink and drive.

  * Call for a ride instead of getting in a car with a drunk driver.

  * No texting while driving.

  * Always wear a seat belt.

Because the chance of a deadly crash occurring with each additional passenger,  it is critical for parents to set limits with their teen on the number of passengers in a car. It is also helpful to limit driving at night and on weekends for the same reason.

Getting a driver's license is an American right of passage.  Let's work together to make sure our teens drive responsibily.

For more information on this topic check out MADD at http://www.madd.org/.